giving

That statement can be misunderstood, so it’s worth clarifying what it does and does not mean. It is not a justification to be selfish, ignore others, break commitments, or dismiss the impact we have on people. It simply means that without taking care of ourselves, we don’t have much to offer anyone else.

It’s similar to a car that won’t run without gas. We need rest, nourishment, and experiences that genuinely support our well-being. That nourishment isn’t only physical. It can come from time with people we love, being in nature, quiet moments alone, creative outlets, or practices like meditation or prayer. The specifics are different for each of us, but the principle is the same: when we are depleted, everything else suffers.

Taking care of ourselves is not about accumulation or external things. It’s about being filled in a way that allows us to move through the world with more clarity and energy.

Giving to others is one of the most meaningful ways to experience that sense of fullness. When it comes from a genuine place, it often feels better than receiving. It allows us to share what we have—our time, attention, care, or presence—in a way that connects us to others.

This kind of giving is not about obligation. It’s not tied to holidays, expectations, or social pressure. It happens when we recognize a need and respond to it naturally, without keeping score. It’s an extension of having something to give in the first place.

At the same time, there is an important distinction to be made. Not all giving is received in the same way, and not all of it is sustainable.

There was a time when I spent a great deal of energy trying to give to people in my life—family members, friends, colleagues—in ways that weren’t recognized or appreciated. It wasn’t something anyone asked for. It was something I chose to do, often out of a desire to make others happy or maintain relationships. Over time, it became draining.

That experience made something clearer to me. There is a difference between a simple “thank you” and a deeper sense of gratitude. Gratitude carries a kind of presence and appreciation that goes beyond acknowledgment. It has a way of continuing forward, often showing up as care, respect, or a desire to give in return, not necessarily to the same person, but outward into the world.

When giving is consistently met without that kind of awareness, it can start to feel one-sided. Over time, that imbalance depletes rather than connects.

This doesn’t mean we stop giving. It means we become more aware of where our energy goes. Giving where it is received with appreciation tends to create a cycle that continues, while giving where it is not can quietly drain us.

In that way, taking care of ourselves and giving to others are not separate ideas. They are connected. When we are grounded and supported, we are better able to give in ways that are meaningful. And when we give in environments where it is received, it reinforces that sense of balance.

Learning to recognize that difference has been part of my own process. It has shifted how I think about where I place my energy and how I choose to give it.

Thanks for taking the time to read. I’d love to hear your thoughts!

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