We have to be able to talk about things that matter. It is the only way to create a secure and fair future. There are many ways and areas in which this is needed, but my blog today is about political matters.
We have to demand our elected officials are people of moral integrity and have the fortitude and curiosity to consider all opinions, even ones different from their own.
Leaders are supposed to be our inspiration to make the world a better place. We should ask them to Be the Change we want to see.
The world I want to see does not include bullying, meanness and heckling. Getting things done is not accomplished in that manner unless there is a fire or war and the fighters need to listen – pronto.
While it might seem like it, at the moment there is no emergency and there is no place for using degradation and meanness to get things done.
Tuesday evening, I attended to a banned book club on the Handmaid’s Tale. For anyone unfamiliar with the story, it’s a novel based on a mix of completely true historical events cobbled together into something that based on the past and the mindset that “it could never happen here”, could very likely happen just about anywhere.
Anywhere being the good ol’ United States of America in the fictional state of Gilead.
At the end of the book there is a short chapter taking place in the far future where historians reference the book as the first period of Gilead. In this future chapter, the reference of the first period assumes there are many other periods of time following before Gilead fell. What seems frightening is that I could almost see a future in which historians are studying the rise and fall of the United States which at just over 200 years old was taken over by extremists, beginning the first period of a reign of something none of us could have foreseen.
Think about it.
How can such a thing happen in a place where “it could never happen here”?
Perhaps it is because people become afraid to talk or do anything about anything that they perceive as potentially uncomfortable.
Are we not already at a place where this is the case?
What does this have to do with our leaders?
The italicized below is from an exchange between my brother Mario & I yesterday morning.
BEFORE you have an opinion about it, can you consider the topic as it relates to civility? The point is about RESPECT. Yes, the writer said negative things about someone you may or may not like, the grammar of my writing or his might not be perfect, but if you miss the message about being civil you are missing the focus and crux of the blurb and this blog.
Mario: Maybe this United States isn’t worth saving.
Esterina: What now? I meant there are so many reasons, but what is today’s?
Mario: Just saw a clip of state of union address last night. Margorie Taylor Green, actually heckled Biden. Interrupting the President of the US. In the middle of a nationally televised speech. I am sure it’s viewed internationally. This pig of a congresswoman. Senators hooting and hollering like a Baptist church.
Look somehow if we in anyway accepted this, if the people elect a woman who interrupts a state of the union address, then it’s too far gone.
If civility is not in the people, then by default incivility must be in the people.
And no it’s too far gone. How do you solve that? How do you explain to people to be decent?
As I was writing the start of this blog yesterday, Mario texted more. I’ll paste it at the end because I think it wraps up the point I am trying to make nicely.
I didn’t want to post this because it could seem polarized. It could seem like I am a liberal and that might automatically put me in a box where I want to tear down statues and defund the police. Instead of doing that, it would be easier for me to post a photo of my dog and talk about my wonderful life.
While I am focusing on my lovely life (whether or not it’s actually lovely at the moment) and being afraid to voice my opinion and the wrath of what people think about what they think my opinion is, more people will be rallying (most quietly) and thanking Marjorie Taylor Green for having the courage to heckle what they perceive as a moron. That is not the world and change I want to see.
Similar to what the world must have been like before Gilead in the Handmaid’s Tale, it is far easier to go on with our everyday lives, remain neutral and be fearful that if you voice an opinion that you will be boxed into a category of ‘sides’ and get into an argument where two viewpoints are attempting to convince the other party of the right way to do things instead of listening respectfully and considering opinions different from their own.
A 2021 Gallop shows a record number of Americans who identify as independent. Myself included. A record number of people remaining quietly neutral.
I think we are remaining neutral because it seems both sides have moved to extreme views that we do not agree with. However, as we are remaining neutral, those sides are still “duking it out” and becoming more powerful in ways the majority of us do not agree with. While they are behaving like we are in combat and not like a democracy with a constitution that requires we consider both sides; either side could “win” and change the shape of our future completely.
I’m not sure how to stop this except to rally together with others to shame meanness, hatred and inability to behave decently in our day-to-day lives and in our elected officials.
We need to demand that our leaders do their jobs by being an example of morality, kindness and having the ability to listen to a viewpoint different than their own without shaming and demoralizing the other side.
While remaining neutral and not talking about things that matter seems safe right now, history has showed this has lead to consequences I am certain we do not want. It can change by making it the norm to have discussions about uncomfortable things.
The New York Times in America Has a Free Speech Problem wrote the following:
For all the tolerance and enlightenment that modern society claims, Americans are [afraid to] voice their opinions in public without fear of being shamed or shunned.
How has this happened? In large part, it’s because the political left and the right are caught in a destructive loop of condemnation and recrimination around cancel culture. Many on the left refuse to acknowledge that cancel culture exists at all, believing that those who complain about it are offering cover for bigots to peddle hate speech. Many on the right, for all their braying about cancel culture, have embraced an even more extreme version of censoriousness as a bulwark against a rapidly changing society, with laws that would ban books, stifle teachers and discourage open discussion in classrooms.
Being afraid and sticking to your side is very human and natural. But we need to demand more of our leaders. They need to be able to inspire us to step out of our comfort zones, not retreat into them.
While we are mindlessly watching kitten videos and the Handmaid’s Tale on Hulu thinking we are safe and free in our nation, it’s very possible that the mindless head in the sand attitude is how one of the extremist sides will take over and our ancestors will wonder how the heck we let it happen….
Mario: Of the state of the union address last night. I don’t watch because what’s really said? Rhetoric?
But Margorie Taylor Greene interrupted Biden, heckled him, called out loud from her seat in the congressional chamber and interrupted the leader of the free world.
I have my criticisms of Biden too. In that short clip the poor man kept tripping over his own words. It made him appear frail and weak to me.
Let me take a step back and say I believe small things come together to make big things.
So I am the type of person who pulls up to a restaurant and sees lights out on the exterior signage and I think, if they can’t get bulbs replaced, what kind of food am I in for. Then I go use the restroom and it’s not sparkling clean and I think what does the kitchen look like.
If Biden (supposed to be the most powerful man in the world) can’t command the respect to not be interrupted. Well that’s saying something about him. Teachers would be considered failures if they’re interrupted.
If we elect a woman who doesn’t have decency enough to listen to Biden on this stage, that says something about her and the constituents.
If she is not shunned by congress members that says something about them.
And if this isn’t shocking us, then that says something about “us”.
It means we’re used to this, it means we accepted this or have become blasé to this behavior.
We cannot be considered a great nation if that’s the case.
What does it mean for the US to be great?
What it means for me is this. That at one time we formed a nation bound in its political beliefs. Namely free speech, religion, tolerance, we could assemble and protest and pursuit life, liberty, property, happiness.
We respected each other, we thought debate was a virtue, we listened to each other and were willing to be wrong. Because we created a nation a place and time on earth where opportunity existed. Merit was rewarded and on and on. This was our greatness, never perfect but we believed in something, and that something was good and part of that good was decency.
We have become indecent. We write and accept tax laws that are these super complicated laws with secret loopholes that are only available to people rich enough to hire highly trained tax attorneys to find the secrets.
That is indecent thing for our government to do to citizens for whom they’re supposed to be working for.
And I can write a book on all the ways we have become indecent. But shocked I was to find out in the state of the union someone can interrupt the speaker.
Congress and the nation is there to hear what that man, Biden has to say, they are not there to hear her. Her electors watching that behavior should never vote for her again.
When you interrupt a speech your saying (without saying) you have no respect for Biden. For what he is saying and that you’re there not to listen but to speak or disrupt.
Even if you’re the biggest MAGA person, shouldn’t you at least respect the other side that you need to work with to solve the problems of this nation?
When we collectively lose sight of that, which by not being shocked we have, we have already all just lost.
I mean if we can’t stand up to interruptions, how do we stand up to Hamas bombing Jews and what seems like Jews overreacting?
The small things make the big things.
It starts with the small things. Every person should consider the following when they are about to speak:
- Is it true?
- Is it kind?
- Is it necessary?
Why don’t we rally together and Cancel Meanness?
Why don’t we call out and shame someone who is being disrespectful?
Why don’t we stop being afraid of what other people think and engage in open discussions about things that matter with the intent to learn something you might not have considered before?
The words and signs BE KIND don’t say enough, but it says it all.
esterinaanderson.com 